River Forest Freshman Guilty of Farting in Students' Water Bottles
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For 2 years, River Forest Jr Sr Highschool has been faced with multiple cases of "smelly bottles." Students often bring bottles of water or juice to drink throughout the school day in class. But since two years ago, the seventh graders at the time have been noticing that when they open their drinks, they are met with a foul smell described as smelling like rotten eggs and mulch.
"I was almost done with my gatorade," said a freshman this year at River Forest who wishes to not be named. "When I went to take that last drink I had in the bottle, a strong smell hit me. I thought someone had farted next to me, but then I sniffed the bottle and it was coming from inside."
Several other students throughout the years have described similar happenings. So, who is the infamous "Gastronaut?"
Students point to none other than 15-year-old Madison LaFollette who is a Freshman this year.
"I don't know why I started doing it," says the methane-maniac. "It's an urge, now. An addiction.
LaFollette is now receiving help for her anal oxcide attacks.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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