Trumps Ex-Boyfriend found dead in Mexico
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Trumps Ex-Boyfriend dating back from his time in Germany was found executed right at the border. He was about to leave from vacation, when he suddenly had been kidnapped by masked men who recognized him because of his "facial features". We climbed over the wall to investigate and the person responsible was actually willing to make an interview.
Trump and the entire United States are shocked by the horrors of this fatal act of retaliation and the world is terrified by their access to high-tech weaponry. "It's because this dude blocked everything, mane. Now me 'n' mah homies can't get over to get us some doritos and guns at the nearest Wal-Mart." reported Abu Hajar. "I felt betrayed, he was always there to help us but since he is in office... pff everything changed."
While the borders have practically closed in the North, the Special Forces of IKEA (Islamic Kaliphate of Ecuador and America) which consists of professionally trained Ninja Assassins, have gained access to southern territories of Mexico and quickly took over towards the North.
Interviewer: Where did you get that weapon from?
Abu Hajar: I actually ordered one from Amazon which I found in the Weapon category. It was pretty cheap and high quality. It cuts through anything like butter without getting your clothes messy. It even had batteries included.
I: What is your next plan, Abu Hajar?
A: First i'm going to train a little bit on how to use that saber correctly. I'm going to watch some movies on Netflix which is going to be torture because I really can't enjoy movies without any bbq-flavored doritos. After that, I'm going to the local store and buy myself a ladder and attempt to get over and take New Mexico. Believe me, It's that easy.
I: Well, good luck on that mate.
A: Thank you, btw i wanna say hi to my mom who is currently in the states. Miss you mom :*
Disturbing, President Trump is actually gay.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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