Meet The Man With The Worlds Smallest P****

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A Connecticut man, Carlos Burns, has been officially recognized by Guinness World Records for having the smallest penis. According to Carlos and his doctors, his fully-functioning penis is only 1/16th of an inch, the smallest for a fully-grown, adult male.

“For a long time, I was very embarrassed by my penis, but now, I pretty much just go with it,” said Carlos. “I’m 35 now, and I’ve had girls who have come up to me, after they found out about it, and said they ‘just had to try it out,’ so I can’t even tell you how many women I’ve been with because of it.”

Carlos says that he was picked on in high school locker rooms for years, because most of his classmates thought he might actually be a girl.

“For a long time, it got so bad [the teasing] that I thought I might be a girl, too,” said Carlos. "The guys would laugh at me, and tell me it looked like I had a big clit, and they are right, it totally does. But it’s okay, because a lot of those guys died since high school. Heroin is a hell of a drug, and I’m climbing the ranks at a Fortune 500 company, so hey, you win some, you lose some right?”

Carlos says he takes his record with pride, and has “no desire” to have surgery to enlarge his penis.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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