Birmingham on high alert!!!!

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Today security within the Birmingham area has been stepped up pending the arrival of a northampton woman wanted in relation to bad dance moves and sitting on toilets for hours. she is described as " a threat to the eye area" Members of the public are being advised to look away, do not approach this woman.

The artist known as Billy Ocean has been quoted as saying "Thats not all she is wanted for, she is a lethal weapon. if that woman throws her nickers at me, im dead, have you seen the size of her drawers?" Shakin Stevens also issued a statement saying " This woman is threatening to throw her overgrown thong at me when she comes to see me in may. I cant deal with this kind of injury, the size of them would be catastophic."

A spokesperson for the Birmingham area revealed " we know her well, ingelbert Humperdink never stood a chance, how are these artists meant to cope?".

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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