BREAKING NEWS: Gene Arrested for inhumane treatment of a food product in public
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Gene Verene, 40, of Glen Cove N.Y. was arrested today on what Nassau County Police are saying is the worst case of Food Abuse the County has seen since David Horton discovered half Price Appetizers at Applebees in 2012.
While trying to apprehend Mr. Verene he held a Knife and Fork to the throat of a whole pig he was sitting on during his meal. When the Officers deployed their Tazers, it is said that Mr. Verene sizzled like a piece of freshly fried bacon.
It is unknown at this time if when Mr. Verene will be in front of a judge. When someone is apprehended for a crime as unprecedented as this one, they must go through a thorough cavity search and Mental Health evaluation. We will have more on this once the smoke from his sizzling sweat dissipates.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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