Update: Wanted Waynesboro man last seen crossing border, aided by accomplices

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Wayne Arey, 46, of Waynesboro, is the man who police say is wanted in connection to a series of possible terrorist videos containing hidden messages in an as-of-yet undecoded hand gesture-based language made under the guise of being for the hearing-impaired is now on the run and is accused of robbing a group of Girl Scouts who were holding a cookie sale in front of a Wal-Mart in Blue Ball, Arkansas, nabbing $420 and 17 boxes of Thin Mints. Becoming irate after being informed that they were out of their S'mores cookies, Mr. Arey jumped into his vehicle and ran their display stand over before making a run for it. Police believe he committed this robbery to fund his getaway, as it is believed that all money he had previously earned as a pizza delivery driver had been spent on beer, incense and beard oil.


At a police briefing held at the Waffle House in Waynesboro, Police Chief Lou Smorals stated "The actions of Mr. Arey boggles the mind. Sure, we've all been angry that the Girl Scouts are always conveniently sold out of S'mores cookies but to act in such a way is disturbing.Rest assured though, we are working in cooperation with multiple law enforcement agencies across the country to bring this deviant to justice." Chief Smorals went on to say that while Virginia residents were in the clear for now, the residents of California needed to be prepared "As of one hour ago, Mr. Arey was seen crossing the border between California and the United States of 'Murica in a 1968 tye-dyed Volkswagen Bus with Virginia license plate number 3AT-M3, although this plate appears to be a fake, as there is no record of it with the Virginia DMV."

Outside sources say that Mr. Arey may have an accomplice(s) assisting him in obtaining false papers, as well as rumors of another member of his message relay service stepping up to take his place in sending coded messages abroad but as of now, all except Mr. Arey remain unidentified.


Residents of California are urged to contact Crimefloppers at 1-900-867-5309. Any information leading to an arrest could result in a reward of up to $19.99

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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