Barrels & Sons Brewery Announce Plans to Purchase Minnesota Brewery
Thursday 22 April 38736 Shares
The brewery, owned and operated by the notable sons of several prominent American business tycoons has announced plans to acquire hot new St. Paul (MN) brewery Barrel Theory Beer Company. They promise that the beer will stay the same as it has been since it's humble beginnings in a modest Montana Yurt Village to the denim-lined boulevards of St. Paul. Brewer and ostrich boot aficionado Timmy "Butthurt" Johnson confirmed the rumors, stating "This is a fantastic opportunity for our brand. The Boys plan to get out there, roll up their sleeves and literally sell our beer to places where it is consumed. For some reason, they asked repeatedly if we had any clean pilsners, which was strange, we don't get that question very often, but hey, different strokes. The Boys have been pouring their heart and soul, blood sweat and tears into building this company since the devastating AB-Inbev merger and we are very humbled and excited to see what they can do to for our brand, like maybe anchor the marketing with some classic Americana images and stock photos of out-of-touch trust fund babies."