Jessup Finally Runs Out Of Fucks To Give
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Mayor Price and Chief Fitzgerald call for calm, as Doremus Jessup searches for someone to hold his beer. Witnesses claim that earlier Mr. Jessup was heard discussing how he had finally run out of fucks to give. Later he was seen to have set up M-18 claymore mines in his front yard, and was heard to be saying something not clearly heard about kids and his yard. We can only assume this to mean that he intends to keep juveniles out of his yard with extreme prejudice.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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