USGS Petitions White House to intervene due to national shortage of rocks
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 67068 Shares
The United States Geological Survey has been gathering information from reports flowing to them from states reporting critical shortages of rocks. Nationwide states have been concerned and are in an ecological uproar after they have noticed rocks disappearing en masse from their landscapes only to reappear in other parts of the areas with a new paint job. "These rocks are important to our landscapes and help to prevent erosion to our riverbanks and water areas. Once these criminals are located, we plan on prosecution to the fullest extent of the law.", said the mayor of one city who refused to give his name, for fear of retribution. The USGS is petitioning the White House for additional funding for a new department charged with rock recovery and cleaning. The crew would scour the areas most affected, searching for painted rocks. First and foremost, rocks with any religious symbols would be found as not to cause any further offence to the public in general. Once the offending rocks are recovered, all paint would be removed with an environmentally neutral paint remover, then returned to the National Forestry Service and the to re-distributed to the most needed areas. The Environmental Protection Agency would also be brought in to ensure that no pollutants would be released into the water supply due to the enormous amount of paint removers that would be used.
The White House thus far has refused to comment.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
a monkey escapes from the miami zoo and throws bananas from a tree Mario a monkey from the Miami Zoo has escaped last Friday from his cage when he escaped, he threw bananas at people from all over Los Angeles. This has led to a video called "banana rain going viral" right now this little criminal monkey is found in prison.
-
2
octopus teaches math at harvard They hire octopus to teach math at harvard, the octopus is called arnold and it is said that he is paid 3000 dollars per class. here are some images