Melania Trump Vanished After Surgery – She Is Missing, Husband Suspect
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Melania Trump has been missing for 15 days now. The White House has been silent on this issue. When asked, White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said: "Melania is not missing, she just found a good hiding spot." When we pushed the subject: "The president is aware of this and has two of the finest investigators investigating this. Boris and Natasha have been searching the White House grounds for over a week, they were close till a squirrel got in their way."
We were tired of Sanders bullshit so we went right to the Attorney General of the United States, Jeff Sessions, when pressed he said: "I do not understand the question, can you phrase it in the form of a answer?" All we had said at this point was: "hello." We had spend over 3 minutes with Mr Sessions before he cracked under pressure ( we asked him how he likes his job ). He informed us that he suspects the husband of foul play. He stated; "we have been looking into her husband for sometime now. We know of the incest and the raping of many women, what we did not know was how small his penis really is." He went on: "This is the reason he likes his women very young, being so small like he is, the younger girls have no one to judge him by, this helps with all his insecurities." Now this reporter understands why Mr Trump hates Jeff Sessions so much, he knows the truth about his "hand" size.
So now we have an Attorney General suspicious of the husband. It makes me wonder what he has done to her? Missing for 15 days and no one is asking questions...Oh wait, a tweet just came across my desk from the president, it states:
"My wife has been deported, under my new rules of speaking English, she failed. She will not be allowed back into the USA. I also have talked Jared Kushner ( JEW ) into leaving Ivanka. Now we will bring back a classy good looking first couple again....
....So starting Monday, incest is now legal in all states except Kentucky and Alabama where it's been legal for years, I told you I would MAGA, Winning and I am President."
Okay, this reporter just quit his job and is moving to Mexico.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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