Americans Shocked to Learn They Can Drink Water from the Faucet
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With fears over COVID-19 causing a panic across the country, supermarkets are beginning to run out of essential items.
“I’ve never seen anything like it in all my days,” says Mary Swift, deputy manager of the local Kroger’s. “People were banging on the door before we opened this morning. It’s like Black Friday has come nine months early.”
When asked what items were selling out, Mary said, “Oh you know, the usual things. Canned goods, toilet paper, frozen hotdogs. All the usual things people used to keep in their fall out shelters back in the good old days.”
Walking through the store, we could see the impact that panic buying had had on the shelves. In the bottled water aisle we came upon Sarah Roger who was distraught at the general mayhem.
“What am I supposed to do? They have completely sold out of bottled water! How am I supposed to get my water now?”
When we pointed out that Sarah could turn on her faucet and drink a glass of water from the sink, she looked at us as though we were insane before running off through the grocery store, screaming about the end of days.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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