Science Nerd, Maloney, Loses Hand Virginity
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During the course of August, time were becoming worse and worse. The only way to combat this struggle was to alleviate deep pain from within. A former NASA engineer and public broadcaster for the Virgin News Network, Ryan Maloney, has taken action in his own hands. On August 9, at 11:52 P.M., Maloney ejaculated, while gazing at a calculus textbook in a sexual context. Prayers and concerns go out to the Maloney family.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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