Minnehaha County search for Suspect

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Tuesday 09 August 2059 18077 Shares

Minnehaha County search for Suspect

Tuesday night, in the 4500 block of West 12th St two obese women in a 2004 Nissan Altima claimed to have been pulled out of their car and attacked by a man only known as “Ritz Bits.” Alissa DirtyHorse (23) and Tonya SquatPiss (27) were out late night returning to their home in the Weeg Trailer Park when a man, wearing an Attic T-Shirt ran up to the car and squeezed the women’s breasts reciting “Ritz Bits wants Ritz Tits” in a menacing shout. DirtyHorse was able to free her self and grab a bottle of Pinnacle Vodka and struck the man in his head before fleeing. If anyone has information on the whereabouts of this suspect please call 1-800-Ritz-Bitz

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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