Salem County, Man Arrested For Too Much Snot Backed up In His Nostrils
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Jaron Maldonado is also known as Snotty Pippen, Is very dangerous when he is sick. He has been on the Run for 3 months. He was Arrested late last night at 11:53pm outside of Cresents Blowing his nose. After trying to make a run for it, Officer Johnson slowed him down with the lethal nose plunger. His bail is up to $47,000,000,000
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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