RUSKIN METH DEALERS PROTEST 2 NEW MARIJUANA FARMS
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Florida’s Department of Health has licensed two more medical marijuana treatment centers, to be located in Ruskin Florida. Local meth dealers find this an infringement of their right to produce and distribute methamphetamine. They feel that these farms will drastically reduce their business if customers can legally get stoned and not lose their teeth. The National Association of Meth Dealers said that this is very typical of Government interference with American's right to produce illegal drugs. Stock prices on Sudafed plummeted when word of the 2 Ruskin farms growing weed surfaced.
Local residents also had opinions on the new farms. Frank Harrison of Ruskin said, “How come we ain't got no Target store here, but have marijuana farms?”. Other residents expressed their concern over the fact that Ruskin may not have enough fast food restaurants to accommodate the farm workers who get the “super munchies” as they work.
City leaders are concerned that during the wildfire season should these fields could catch on fire, making Ruskin the most popular city in Florida. Business's appear to be preparing for the influx of customers, the local feed store has changed it's name to “Weed & Feed”. More as this story develops.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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